Loosing It All
by softballer24
Summary: Jade was a gifted softball player. that's all her life is about. What will happen when she busts up her shoulder and can't continue playing softball? How can a mystery boy help her deal with accepting her future without softball? In a world of pain and regret, will there be a light in all of the darkness?
1. Chapter 1

It was almost a perfect day. The sun was shining, she aced her math test, and she had a softball game. Jade Andrews was sure of her future. Starting pitcher for Alabama's softball team. That's all she saw. That's all she could be. Tonight's game would ensure her spot in Alabama. A recruiter was coming to watch her play, and he was going to see her at her best. Jade was feeling a perfect game coming on. Jade was the player all teams wanted. Today would be a good day.

"Hey Andrews! Start warming up your arm!" Coach Ryan shouted from the dugout. "Okay. Don't stress Coach, today's game will be an easy victory." Jade said with a look of confidence on her face. She had forty-five minutes before the game started. She walked with Bailyn over to the dirt in the outfield. Bailyn was the team's best catcher. She was also Jade's best friend since kindergarten. She was the one person Jade knew would be there with her throughout everything. "You think Madison will show?" Bailyn asked with a look of hope in her eyes. "Of course. He knows how important this night is to both of us." Answered Jade. Bailyn was going to get a full ride scholarship with Jade to Alabama. They were a package deal. A perfect one, at that. Madison was Jade's other best friend. He was the guy every girl wanted, but he wasn't interested in any girls. Though Bailyn was into him, he wouldn't open up to anyone. Except Jade.

Game time. The team gathered around third base for a pre-game pep talk.

Inning one. Jade's team started in the field. Jade threw five pitches before Bailyn called 'balls in, coming down.' As the batter stepped up into the box, Jade looked into the stands, searching for Madison. He was there. Brown eyes glowing at her as he gave her a thumbs-up. Jade felt all her stress melt away as she looked into his eyes. Looking away, Jade saw Bailyn hold one finger up, between her legs, hiding the sign from everyone but Jade. Fastball, inside. Strike. Bailyn signed a three. Change-up, away. A big swing and a miss. Two strikes on the batter, the next pitch had to be a ball. A few pitches later, and the count was full. This pitch had to count. Bailyn signed Jade a five. Screwball. Jade watched her perfectly thrown ball go straight down the middle then screw towards the batter hands. One down, two to go. The next two outs were fielded cleanly by the infield and then the Huskies were up to bat. Jade was the fourth batter in the line-up. The batter with the most power, who the team relied on to hit a big hit and score runs. And that's exactly what happened, Jade hit a triple, driving two batters home.

It was top of the fourth inning, and Jade started to feel her shoulder's pain like never before. She wasn't going to give up on her team, though. She pushed aside the pain and threw another pitch. She had to push through this, she couldn't let down her team. Jade set up to throw a fastball, and that's when her world came crumbling down. She remembered winding up and feeling an excruciating pain in her shoulder. The next thing she knew, she was laying in the dirt, screaming a clutching her shoulder. Her team was around her, Bailyn and her coaches. But all she could think of was the pain in her shoulder. What happened? She vaguely remembered Coach Ryan calling 911.


	2. Chapter 2

Jade woke up to bright lights in her face and the small of antiseptic. Blinking her eyes, Jade saw Bailyn and Madison sleeping in the chairs beside her bed. Bailyn still had her softball uniform on and her catchers gear was in a pile in a corner of the room. She must have left with her in the ambulance. Madison was in the same clothes as well. I guess neither of them went home to change.

Not wanting to wake them, Jade quietly got out of the hospital bed to go to the bathroom. When she looked in the mirror, she immediately wished she hadn't. She saw a brace over her right shoulder and it wrapped around under her left arm. Her stomach twisted in a knot. The doctors did a good job with the medication, Jade couldn't feel the pain, though she was sure it was there. Then she thought of the game. She had failed her team. What did the recruiter do? Was her one chance with Alabama gone?

"Jade?" She heard Bailyn call out. Jade turned away from the horrible sight in the mirror and went to see her friends. Bailyn immediately pulled her into a gentle hug, while Madison watched Jade like she might burst out in tears. When Bailyn let go, Jade found herself in Madison's arms. Comforted by his strong chest, warm hands and steady heartbeat. He kissed the top of her head and held her close. When Jade pulled away, she was scared all over again.

"What happened? All I remember is the pain and screaming." Jade spoke to her best friends. Bailyn was the one to answer. "I saw you wind up for your pitch and then everything changed. Your arm jerked to the side and your shoulder popped out of place. You fell on the ground and you were screaming and clutching your shoulder. I about had a heart attack. I've never heard you scream like that before. I never want to hear it again!" Bailyn shivered, remembering the awful sounds of pain her best friend screamed. "These screams topped the night where we watched all those scary movies." Madison joked, trying to get Jade to smile, knowing he won't see many more for a while to come.

The door opened and a doctor walked in. "Ah, Jade. Good, you're up. If you could sit on the bed, I would like to check your shoulder out. I'm not sure whether or not your friends filled you in on what we did." When a look of puzzlement crossed Jade's face, the doctor went on. "Your excessive amount of pitching damaged the rotator cuffs in your shoulder. I'm afraid if they don't heal right, your shoulder will have pain when you do certain movements. I'm not sure how to tell you this but you won't be pitching ever again. You can't play softball again. I am so very sorry but life offers other things. I recommend to rest and heal your shoulder before you get involved in any other non-athletic activities. We're going to keep you in the hospital for a few more days to monitor your shoulder." The doctor said, wrapping Jade's shoulder back up.

As the doctor left the room, Jade felt her eyes well up with tears. Madison and Bailyn wrapped her in a hug as Jade let herself cry for the first time in a long time.


	3. Chapter 3

Jade lay awake in the hospital bed. She just couldn't shut off her brain. How was she supposed to accept that softball is over for her? She could feel the pain in her chest, making it hard to breathe. She looked over at Madison's sleeping figure. Bailyn had gone home to get rest for school in the morning but Madison refused to leave Jade's side. He didn't care much about school, though he got good grades. Unable to sit still, Jade got up and turned on the shower. She let the hot water wash over her body, her ugly shoulder covered in scars and stitches from the operation. The hot water felt nice and relaxed her. Jade got out of the shower and splashed cold water on her puffy face. The last time Jade cried, she had broken her ankle sliding into home. If her ankle healed, why couldn't her shoulder?

Jade slipped her hospital gown over her head and left the bathroom. She found Madison awake and his head turned toward her once she opened the door. He said nothing, just got up and engulfed her in a hug. Jade could feel is warmth all over her. She was glad he stayed, sometimes he understood her better than anyone. He didn't need to ask how she was handling everything, he just knew. After a few minutes, he sensed she didn't want to let him go so he picked her up and carried her to the bed. Madison gently laid her down under the covers then climbed in himself. She wrapped her arms around his torso and laid her head against his chest. His hand made soothing circles on her back, and she eventually fell asleep.

**Madison's P.O.V.**

As Jade lay sleeping in my arms, I couldn't help but think of everything she has gone through in her life. When she was twelve, both her parents had died in a car crash. Madison thought of how hard it was for her to live life without them. Her parents had loved her with everything they had. Jade had been forced to grow up way too fast. She had to take care of herself. Her brother is addicted to drugs. He was hardly ever home , and when he was, he was out cold. After her parents had died, Jade joined the softball team. At first, she just needed something to occupy her time with. Then she had grown to love it. When Jade, Madison, and Bailyn started high school, it was great. Jade and Bailyn were the girls every guy wanted. Bailyn loved all the attention, for a while. Jade made sure all the boys knew she wasn't that type of girl. She intimated a lot of people. Tomorrow, Jade's team would be by, along with a few guys from the football team and from Madison's wrestling team before school started. Jade and Bailyn were accepted because they ruled the softball field. Madison was the greatest wrestler the school had in a long time. Still, he wasn't accepted as easily. In his singlet, you could see a lot of his tattoos. People were scared of him. He wasn't a guy you wanted to mess with. Yet here he was, Jade asleep in his arms, and he was content.

**Jade's P.O.V.**

In the morning, Jade was eating breakfast in the hospital cafeteria with Madison. She wasn't really up to talking and Madison knew it. She didn't have the appetite to eat either, but Madison made her eat all her cereal. That's when her team came walking in. Bailyn sat down next to her and hugged her.

"Hey Coach." Jade said, forcing a smile. "How's the shoulder?" Coach Ryan replied.

"Well, aside from my softball career being over, I think I'll be fine." Jade said with a frown. "That's why I'm here. I really wanted to talk to you about that. Will you join me for a walk?" Jade got up and Coach continued as they went for a walk. "Once I say you laying on the mound, I knew your career was over. I've seen many baseball pitchers blow out their elbow in college. It's not pretty, and it ends their career. Jade, I know you think softball is all you have, but there's so many other options. You might be interested in photography or music-" "I don't want to make music, I want to play in the field!" Jade said with protest. "Let me speak. I'm not telling you to forget you ever played softball I'm telling you moving on is going to be so much easier if you remember your time as a good memory instead of something you can't have."


	4. Chapter 4

**Jade's P.O.V.**

****_I've been home from the hospital for a week now. The doctor gave me the 'okay' to attend school tomorrow. I don't want to go for many reasons. One, softball. As if that's not reason enough, everyone will be staring and asking stupid questions. Not like there's a person at Douglas county High School who doesn't know what happened. Two, Nick Davis. In the past week, I have gotten twelve missed calls and about twenty texts. I really don't want to talk to him or see him. There's only so much Nick Davis a person can handle in their life._

Jade capped her pen and set her journal aside. She picked up her phone and texted Madison to come over. She desperately needed someone to talk to and Bailyn had softball. Just thinking of her team made her inside ache with loss and her head spin.

A few minutes later, Jade heard Madison's motorcycle pull up her driveway. A few moments later he walked in her room and sat next to her on her window ceil.

"I really need something to get my mind off everything," Jade said, sitting up.

Madison gave her a knowing look and said, "And by 'something' I assume you mean something dangerous, reckless and stupid?"

Jade smile and nodded her head.

"Well, your options are sky diving, cliff jumping, or riding my motorcycle fast down a dirt road." Jade thought over her options and chose cliff jumping.

**Madison's P.O.V.**

Okay, so maybe it wasn't such a great idea taking Jade cliff jumping, but she needed something to make her smile. She's really lost right now.

Jade walked over to him with an excited smile on her face. The sun was shining and there wasn't he slightest bit of wind. She was in the bikini she wore that summer they vacationed to Hawaii for surfing. She was still beautiful as ever, scars and all. Her scars started at the base of her neck and the longest one continued halfway down her humerus bone. Watching his eyes Jade looked over to her shoulder as well.

"The doctor said they won't ever go away completely. So you're stuck with me looking like this." Jade said cracking a smile.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." Madison replied wrapping her in a hug.

"Thanks for everything, Madison. You've been here for me no matter what every day since we met. I love you." It tore at Madison's heart to know that Jade meant she loved his as a friend, and she'll probably only love him that way. Unless he made his feelings clear. But not now, not today. Someday.

**Jade's P.O.V.**

There was nothing Jade loved more than the feeling of adrenaline. Okay, there was one thing, but she wasn't going to think about that, not today. Spending the day with Madison was just what she needed before she went back to school. He wrapped his hand over hers, and they jumped off the cliff together. It was five seconds of adrenaline. Where you could just enjoy free-falling into cold water, not caring about anything. Then, when you surface again, you can swim back and climb the rocks again and have those five seconds all over again.

Okay, so what they were doing wasn't exactly legal, but neither Jade of Madison cared. After they had their fill of reckless jumping, they spread out their towels and ate lunch. "I am so not ready to start school. Between seeing the field every day and my team…" Jade stopped, sighing. "Jade, it's all going to be okay soon. You have to give up something you love, but you can gain something too. Maybe you'll take an interest in photography or acting." Madison tried to reassure Jade but she wasn't in the mood to look at the glass half full.


	5. Chapter 5

**Jade's P.O.V.**

Jade's alarm went off at exactly 6:00 Monday morning. She pulled herself out of bed and looked in the mirror. Her hair was still tied up in a messy bun and she was wearing sweats and a sports bra. _'Be strong today,' _Jade told herself. She pulled her hair out of the bun, brushed all the knots out if it, and straightened the top half, leaving the bottom wavy. Jade pulled on leggings and a jumper. She applied some light mascara, eyeliner and eye shadow. Then, she went downstairs to eat breakfast. Since both of Jade's parents had died in a car crash six months ago, no one was there to greet her with a cheery smile and a meal. Jade's brother, Noah, was addicted to drugs. Jade dealt with her parents dyeing by playing softball, Noah turned to drugs. Jade sometimes had nightmares about waking up to his lifeless body, due to an over-dose.

Jade tossed a piece of bread in the toaster and got out a jar of Nutella and a knife. She spread the Nutella over the warm bread, slipped on her shoes and checked her phone. She had a missed text from Madison, saying he was coming to get her at 7:10. Jade looked at the clock, it was 7:15. She ran outside and hopped into Madison's car.

"Hey beautiful." Madison always greeted her like that in the mornings. Jade looked into his warm, brown eyes and saw happiness. Jade knew Madison truly cared about her, he would always be there when she called. They drove to school in silence, Jade being very nervous. They got to school and Jade got out, looking at her school. Madison slipped his arm around her and Jade rested her head on his shoulder. "Can we please ditch school?" Jade looked over at Madison hopefully. "You gotta get back to school sometime, Jadie. Come on." Madison said, slipping his hand in hers and guiding her to the school.

To strangers they would have looked like a couple. But Jade wasn't the type of girl that makes commitments like that. In her experience, it would just be easier to not get invested in people. Her parents died, and that messed Jade up. She started going from guy to guy after her parents died. Not getting too attached before she was onto the next one. That's how Madison met her. In eighth grade, she had started hanging out with the wrong group of kids. She didn't smoke cigarettes because that would have destroyed her body and softball career, but she had a few drinks every now and then. No heavy drinking, but enough to be intoxicated and caught by the principle. She got a three day suspension but she didn't really care at that point. Jade had figured that since her parents were dead, her life wasn't really going to go anywhere. Madison found her drinking on school grounds. He had helped her straighten things out in her life and she had a deep bond with him. It was like they were tethered together and no one could come in-between them. Not even Bailyn. She had a crush on Madison and was jealous of the bond him and Jade had but she never showed it.

Madison walked her to her homeroom and left her at the doorway, promising to see her at lunch. Jade took a deep breath and walked in. Everyone grew quiet and stopped to stare.

"Jade! So glad to see you again! How's the shoulder?" Maddie Becker said, flipping her perfect blonde hair over her shoulder with her manicured hand. No doubt being nice to Jade because her boyfriend was sitting three feet behind her. Maddie was the most popular girl in school. Perfect hair, skinny waist, big boobs. The kind of girl that made all guys stop and stare. She had the good life, no problems. Rich parents, dating the quarterback, tons of friends. She was the kind of girl that Jade wanted to punch in the face. "Umm, great." Was all she said. _Not like you actually care, you have the life everyone wants, _Jade thought. Jade made it through homeroom by sitting in the back of the room. No one bothered to turn around to stare at the scars running down her right arm.

Once the bell rang, Jade slipped her backpack on and was the first out the door. Jade had been hoping to spend the day without seeing Tyler. No such luck. He was waiting outside the classroom for Jade. "Looking good Jade." Tyler said with a mischievous smile as he slipped his hand into Jade's, which she immediately ripped out. In her haste to get away from Tyler, she rounded the corner and rain straight into someone. They both fell to the ground, papers flying everywhere. "Oh! I am so sorry!" Jade said, picking up her and the boys' papers. He had light black hair that fell down just above his eyes. He didn't have the 'Bieber' cut that Jade found incredibly stupid. His hair had that _'I just rolled out of bed, and now you're thinking about me in bed,' _look. But Jade found herself staring at his eyes, not his hair. They looked like cold ice in winter mornings. They made Jade wonder if he was looking straight into her soul. Like he could see everything about her with his incredible eyes. Tyler, of course, had to butt in with his opinion. "You stay away from her." He said before picking Jade up by the arm and dragging her down the hall.

Jade found her class periods passed by quite slowly. After fifth period was let out, it was lunch time. Being a senior, she could leave campus for lunch. She always met Madison by his truck and they drove to lunch together. As she was nearing the parking lot, she saw Tyler picking a fight with boy. She immediately recognized him as the kid she bumped into. First there was just shoving then Tyler's fist connected with his face, then his foot with his ribcage. Jade neared in time to hear Tyler shouting at him to get up, and fight like a man. Jade stepped in-between them and Tyler stopped. "Hey Tyler. I'm sorry, but I seem to have forgotten why it was necessary for you to go picking a fight with this kid." Jade said bravely. "He needs to know what's going to happen if he doesn't stay away from you." Tyler said staring directly at the boy. "We bumped into each other in the hallway. It's no big deal. Go get lunch, I think he's had enough." Tyler could tell Jade wasn't going to budge, so with one last hate filled glare at the boy, he left. Jade turned around to see if the boy needed help, but he had already gotten up and left.

The fifty minutes they had for lunch passed quickly and soon Jade and Madison were back on campus. Sixth period was when kids either had an arts class, technology, or sports. Softball was out of the question, the principle had assigned her an arts class, the only class with room available. _Guitar in room M201 with Bruebaker. _

She walked in and all eyes turned to look at her. Eyes trailing the length of her scars. Jade put her head down and walked to the teacher's desk. "Erm.. I'm Jade Andrews, I'm supposed to be taking this class now." Jade said handing the teacher a slip of paper. "Ah, Andrews. Yes, there's an empty seat in the back of the class, next to Damon. Jade waked around the classroom to find that Damon, was the kid that she had ran into. She sat down and their eyes met. Jade noticed the swelling a coloring around his right eye. "Tyler gave you a black eye? I'm sorry!" Jade said looking at Damon with sympathy. "It's really no big deal. Though I gotta say, your boyfriend has a mean right hook." Damon said smirking. "Oh Tyler is NOT my boyfriend. I can't stand him. He's actually a coward. He never comes near me when Madison's around." Damon smiled at her, "I've heard of him. He wrestles right? Everyone is scared of him. Why aren't you?" Jade blushed and said, "Madison really isn't scary. He would do anything to protect the people he loves." Damon took a breath and said "So I'm right to assume he loves you." Jade was about to answer when the teacher started the class. In this new unit, they were supposed to team up with a partner and create chords to a song that lasted for at least a minute. "Well I'm screwed. I don't have the slightest clue about how to play guitar." Jade said as they walked out of class. "I could come over tonight and help you. I figure, since were partners and all, you'd better not suck." Damon said, once again making Jade lost for words with his eyes. "Um.. Yes, I'd like that. Can you be over around 5:30?"


End file.
